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A Friend
We all want and need friends. Without friends, life is miserable and lonely. How, though, do we get friends? And, who is a true friend?
The wise man said, “A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother” (Prov. 18:24). If we are not a friend to others, it is unlikely they will be a friend to us. After all, is it not inherent that friendship is a two-way street? Thus, friendship is truly based on character. It cannot be purchased or coerced (Prov. 19:6).
The characteristics of a true friend are relatively few. A true friend will tell you what you need to hear, not necessarily what you want to hear. This means a friend’s words may sting at times. We see an example of this in Paul’s relationship to the Galatians. He told them they were in sin and asked, “Have I therefore become your enemy because I tell you the truth?” (Gal. 4:16). “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful” (Prov. 27:6). Let us be thankful for friends who tell us the truth.
A friend will help us to improve our character, not drag us down. “As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend” (Prov. 27:17). This may include words of rebuke, but also of admonition and exhortation. A friend will give good advice based on your interest, not his or hers. You will be warned about pitfalls and dangers, or encouraged to press on.
“A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity” (Prov. 17:17). To love at all times does not mean to tolerate or accept at all times. As we noted above, a true friend will sometimes oppose you because your course of action is self-destructive or harmful to others. The love of a true friend will include sacrifice. The friend will forego his or her contentment, comfort, or desires to help you when needed.
An example of a true friend is Jesus Christ and cannot be exceeded. He tells us what we need to hear. He does not sugar coat matters, but is plain and forthright. He improves our character through admonition and encouragement. He loves us at all times, though He does not accept us at all times (Rev. 3:19). When we sin, we must repent or forfeit a relationship to Him (1 Jn. 1:7-9; 2 Jn. 9-11). And, truly, He put our well being ahead of His own when He gave Himself to die on the cross (Phil. 2:5-8). “There’s not a friend like the lowly Jesus.” |
